What Your Child Needs to Know About Sex
A Straight-Talking Guide for Parents
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About the author
Dr. Fred Kaeser is the former director of health for New York City’s public schools, the largest public school system in America. He has a doctoral degree in human sexuality from New York University, where he still teaches. He lives with his family in Centerport, New York.
If you start talking early enough, kids will listen.
FOR MANY PARENTS, the talk is one of the most dreaded rites of passage in the child-raising experience--but it doesn’t have to be. The key is to start early when talking about sex with your child. In Dr. Fred Kaeser’s progressive approach, parents become their child’s first resource for sexual information (instead of ceding control to peers, the school system, or the media) in order to have a lasting and positive influence over their child’s sexual development.
As the former director of health in the New York City public schools, there’s nothing Dr. Kaeser hasn’t been asked by kids, or by parents. And he has seen firsthand the results of our increasingly sexualized youth culture, and how it’s making children grow up faster than ever these days. From sexting to cyberbullying, challenges and pressures abound--even for kids in kindergarten. This means that parents must begin laying the groundwork for basic conversations about sex when their child is as young as three years old. Parents then build their discussions on this early foundation, introducing more information at developmentally appropriate ages (for example, talking about puberty with your eight-year-old, and discussing safe sex with your ten-year-old).
What Your Child Needs to Know About Sex (and When) goes far beyond the birds and the bees to discuss uncomfortable issues with a winning frankness and empowering attitude. It offers families the tools they need for navigating how and when to have positive dialogues about sexuality and helps parents learn to use everyday teachable moments. Open communication about sex with your children isn’t necessarily easy, but it can be done; this indispensable book will guide you every step of the way.
; September 2011
224 pages; ISBN 9781587612640Read online
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Title: What Your Child Needs to Know About Sex
Author: Fred Kaeser
Chapter 1: The Wall of Sexualized Messages 7
Chapter 2: Helping Our Children Make Sense of the Sexualized Wall 19
Chapter 3: The Three Biggest Sex Words in this Book: Love, Respect, and Trust 41
Chapter 4: What’s at Stake: Understanding the Good and Bad Aspects of Sex 59
Chapter 5: It’s a Penis, Not a Doohickey 77
Chapter 6: Everything They Learn About Sex Needs to Start in Kindergarten 95
Chapter 7: No One’s Ever Died from Masturbating 113
Chapter 8: Puberty: Preparing and Beginning Together 129
Chapter 9: Middle School and Beyond 183
About the Author 207
In the press
“Kaeser pulls no punches in his honest approach to the birds and the bees. Parents who put his advice within the context of his primary message--the three most important sex words in this book are love, respect, and trust--will have no doubt that Kaeser is deeply committed to children and their health.”
—Library Journal, STARRED REVIEW
“Dr. Kaeser’s writing style is clear, informative, and wonderfully personal--if you are one of the great majority of parents who is anxious about discussing your child’s sexual development and their questions about sex, then this book must be read.”
—RONALD MOGLIA, Ed.D., New York University