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Self Esteem – A Manual for Mentors

Understanding a complex phenomenon

Self Esteem – A Manual for Mentors by Lou Thompson
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This manual provides a training program for ‘care givers’ - teachers, parents, social workers, sports coaches, etc. who wish to maximize their impact as ‘significant others’ in the process of enhancing children’s self esteem.

Most sources indicate that parents, teachers, peers, community role models, and sports coaches, both in primary and high schools, influence self esteem by the feedback they provide about an individual’s physical, emotional, social and functional self. Lack of opportunities for youth to have contact with appropriate ‘significant others’ leaves them open to whatever influences, chance occasions, and contacts that are available. This can lead to inappropriate risk taking which in turn can develop into a variety of inappropriate behaviors.

This manual is to be used in association with Self Esteem Book 1, Self Esteem Book 2, both published as Ebooks by Ready-Ed Publications. Book 1 (Examining Self Esteem in the Young) is aimed at providing enrichment for primary aged children’s self esteem by focusing on their thoughts and attitudes about themselves and how they fit into their families and community. Book 2 (Raising Self Esteem in the Young) is directed towards primary aged children seen as ‘at risk’ in terms of their self esteem, and concentrates on a number of concepts important in a child’s development.

Throughout this manual reference is made to specific page numbers in the associated Ready-Ed books –  it is intended that these books can also provide a practical vehicle for consolidating on some of the principles detailed here.

The book contains the following sections:

Chapter 1
Understanding A Complex Phenomenon – A Practical Model

Chapter 2
Children With Special Self Esteem Needs –
Identifying and Assisting Them

Chapter 3
The Importance of Mentors’ Self Esteem

Chapter 4
The Importance of Quality Leisure and Time Management

Chapter 5
Making Maximum Use of the *Self Esteem Activity Books


Ready-Ed Publications; March 2001
60 pages; ISBN 9781863970730
Read online, or download in secure PDF format
Title: Self Esteem – A Manual for Mentors
Author: Lou Thompson; Mak=l McGill

The Self Esteem Wall

Underlying a child’s low self esteem is a ‘fear of failure’. This ‘fear of failure’ is not always readily apparent to parents or teachers, nor based upon an adolescent’s realistic evaluation of his/her current performance levels.

For some children this inappropriate ‘fear of failure’ has its origins in a distorted or incomplete self image. For reasons that are sometimes obscure they conclude:

I am different from others. This is unacceptable to others.
I don’t like my individual self. It is inevitable that I will fail.
I wish I could change who I am.

For children who have low self esteem because of an inappropriate self image, intervention needs to be directed at building up their awareness and acceptance of their individual self.

For the majority of children who have an inappropriate ‘fear of failure’ the key source for the dilemma is related to an inappropriate ideal image.

If a child reaches the stage where he or she conclude:

* I cannot meet the expectations that are part of my ideal image;

* I will not achieve the goals that are part of my ideal image;

* the dreams and aspirations that are part of my ideal image are meaningless;

... they are likely to hit the SELF ESTEEM WALL.