The big boy with the big bike standing over me had heard I couldn't feel pain because my Dad was from Hong Kong. I had some kind of invincible power. He'd heard that I really liked hanging out with girls, Chinese burns didn't work on me, pulling my hair was pointless and if you bit me you'd get soy sauce in your mouth. If I was in his shoes, I admit I'd have been curious as well. Whichever way you looked at it I was going to have to play kiss chase later. The cute brunette girl with the orange walkman knew it, the third prettiest netball player knew it, even the dinner ladies knew it. There was going to be a fight.' Such is the life of our hero as he negotiates the triple threat of trying to becoming a cheese ball superstar, finding his cartoon princess, and bringing her home for a perfect Christmas roast potato. It's a life tale of comic disasters, sex (lots of weird sex), relationship nightmares and discovering your nakedness in a world full of people wearing the same old clothes. Honest, warm, funny and very hip, this is David Nicholls with the tears, the pain and the naughty bits put brazenly on display for the world to see.