Pundamentalist

1,000 jokes you (probably) haven't heard before

Gary Delaney,

Pundamentalist: 1,000 jokes you (probably) haven't heard before
 
 

Gary Delaney, one-liner extraordinaire, has appeared on shows like Mock the Week and written for the likes of Jimmy Carr, Jason Manford, and James Corden. Now, for the first time, comes the first collection of his finest jokes. Featuring the likes of:

Garden centres can't reopen fast enough for me, I've been living on borrowed thyme.

We can't even afford a garden, so when my girlfriend bought us a trampoline I hit the roof.

Sure everyone cares about straws killing dolphins now, but they've been breaking camels' backs for years.

Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration, which explains why Prince Andrew is so stupid.

Sad news: The British simile champion has died. We shall not see his like again.

My mom doesn't trust my dad's secretary. I asked her why, and she just said 'I've seen her type before'.

Today someone told me that I look good with a salt 'n' pepper beard, so I took that as a condiment.

My French pen friend just said 'Le Monde', which means the world to me.

Can anyone tell me what FOMO stands for? Everyone else seems to know.

Actors have got Equity, Magicians have got the Magic Circle, but it's a shame ventriloquists don't have anyone to speak for them.

Does anyone know if it's safe to dye your pubes? It's a bit of a grey area.


And make sure you look out for Gary's next book, about Stockholm Syndrome: it starts off badly but by the end you'll really enjoy it . . .



  • ;
  • ISBN:
  • Edition:
  • Title:
  • Series:
  • Author:
  • Imprint:
  • Language:

In The Press


About The Author


Customer Reviews

Verified Buyer

Read online

If you’re using a PC or Mac you can read this ebook online in a web browser, without downloading anything or installing software.

Download file formats

This ebook is available in file types:

This ebook is available in:

After you've bought this ebook, you can choose to download either the PDF version or the ePub, or both.

DRM Free

The publisher has supplied this book in DRM Free form with digital watermarking.

Required software

You can read this eBook on any device that supports DRM-free EPUB or DRM-free PDF format.

Digital Rights Management (DRM)

The publisher has supplied this book in encrypted form, which means that you need to install free software in order to unlock and read it.

Required software

To read this ebook on a mobile device (phone or tablet) you'll need to install one of these free apps:

To download and read this eBook on a PC or Mac:

  • Adobe Digital Editions (This is a free app specially developed for eBooks. It's not the same as Adobe Reader, which you probably already have on your computer.)

Limits on printing and copying

The publisher has set limits on how much of this ebook you may print or copy. See details.

  • {{ format_drm_information.format_name }} unrestricted {{ format_drm_information.format_name }} {{format_drm_information.page_percent}}% every {{format_drm_information.interval}} days {{ format_drm_information.format_name }} off
Read Aloud
  • {{ read_aloud_information.format_name }} on {{ read_aloud_information.format_name }} off
Subject categories
  •  > 
ISBNs